Forgotten Dreams
by VanillaAshes
Summary: Romanogers fic! Natasha and Steve met before he was frozen and before she was a fully-pledged Red Room graduate. (Timeline changed slightly). Fast forward to the Avengers, and let's see where that encounter left them. One Shot.
**Author's Note:**

 **Romanogers Fluff Story. One Shot.**

 **Today, four years ago, I posted my first story on this site! So, here is a story for my four year anniversary :)**

 **In this Steve joined the army in the same way, but it wasn't in the 1940s, it was the 1990s/2000s. So, a few things have been changed to correspond with this, hopefully you don't get confused!**

* * *

 **Russia, 2002; A small room, hidden from the world.**

They smiled in the embrace, both hidden away from their responsibilities; Steve as a recent soldier of the army, not long after being injected with the serum, barely allowed out for combat as he was now 'compromised' and 'dangerous'. He only wanted to help and serve his country. And Natalia, student of the Red Room, days away from her graduation. He was 22, she was 18.

"We could run away together, be together, hide," Natalia suggested, her fingertips grazing over his bare chest- mapping the perfect skin, the way it felt. She knew this couldn't last. She belonged to the Red Room.

"Nat, I can't," He replied remorsefully; she didn't react, expecting that answer. "Come back with me, though. We can still be together."

She shook her head slowly, pulling away from him. "They'd find me- they will _always_ find me."

"Who?" Steve asked, sitting up with her, their legs still intertwined. "Let me help you, please."

"No." Natalia turned to face him, cupping his face with her hands. "It just wasn't meant to be; you're American, I'm Russian. I don't have a place in this wor-with you."

Steve sighed; they'd both known this would happen. The last ten days had been heaven- sneaking around. She had accomplished seven missions in that time, all leading up to her graduation, only two of them including killing the guy. She wasn't sure exactly what Steve was up to, but knew he had a lot of army things to do. She also knew that he was leaving; he was only in this part of Russia for three weeks- she only wished she had met him earlier; then they would have had more time together. "You'll always have a place with me." He whispered after what seemed like hours. "I love you."

Natalia looked him in the eye and knew that he meant it, at least for now. And when she replied, she meant it, too, but she wouldn't forget it like she forgot her parents. She wouldn't move on or love anybody else again. In a few days her training would be complete and he'd be gone, she'd become the Black Widow and fulfill her destiny- she would follow orders, even if that meant killing. It was who she was about to become. And even though she could never talk about him, for fear of them attempting to kill him, he gave her a reason to live, to go through whatever the Red Room had planned for her. Because ten days with him made up for the eighteen years of being raised in the Red Room. "I love you." She didn't add the 'too', because her love wasn't conditional to his.

She melted into his arms as they came around her, willing to spend every second with him she could. She knew the longer she was here, the harder her most recent mission would be- the less time she'd have- but she didn't care.

When he finally pulled away, she let him go; there wasn't another word as he dressed in his 'Captain America' uniform- she had to roll her eyes at it. They shared one long and passionate kiss before he left.

Natalia only allowed herself ten minutes to think things through, to miss him, to memorise him, before getting dressed, taking out her target and returning to base. She would never mention his name, or talk about him to anybody. Those ten days never happened. Two days later and she was the Black Widow- she did not love and she had no place in the world.

* * *

 **America, 2012; On the helicarrier after being recruited for the Avengers.**

Natasha walked out of the helicarrier, her eyes fixated on the muscular silhouette of Captain America. She was expecting him to not recognise her at all; it had been nearly a decade since those ten days. She approached him and Bruce Banner with Fury.

"This is Natasha Romanoff- she'll show you two the way," Fury introduced before literally disappearing- he wasn't one for small talk.

She watched as they both turned around; she had spoken to Bruce Banner earlier, being the one to convince him to come and help.

"Hello again, Miss Romanoff." Bruce said politely with a nod in greeting.

Steve was looking at her attentively. "Yeah, hello." He added distractedly. He seemed either curious or confused- she couldn't tell which.

She offered them both a tight smile; no instant recognition- she wouldn't be the one to remind him. "I recommend we step inside- it's going to get a little hard to breathe." She advised.

"Is this a- a submarine?" Bruce asked as the helicarrier began to shake and shift.

Natasha smirked as the helicarrier started to rise. "Not exactly. Step away from the edge, boys."

Steve's face was comical, eyes wide as saucers. "I don't think so, Banner- we're rising."

"Oh no, this is much worse," Banner commented, taking a glance over the edge before stepping back.

Natasha waited patiently for them to decide when they wanted to go inside.

When Steve turned back to her, presumably to ask a question or demand they get indoors, that strange look crossed his face again as he stared at her red hair.

"Miss Romanoff, let's get inside now." Bruce decided in Steve's silence.

Natasha nodded, sending Steve a strange look- did he remember her? For him, it was probably only five or six years. She turned around and led the way into the helicarrier before walking them to the lab. "This lab is for you, Banner. An agent will show you the way to the briefing when everybody is ready. Rogers, if you'll follow me..."

"Of course," He replied, following her lead. When they were out in the hallway, he pulled her aside. "Did he say _Romanoff_?" He demanded. "Is that your last name?"

Natasha stared at him for a millisecond. "Now it is, yes." She answered truthfully.

"What's your first name?" Was his next question. He was studying her face intently.

"Everybody calls me Natasha Romanoff, or Black Widow," she answered. "However, you knew me when I was Natalia."

His eyes widened and he sucked in a breath. "Natalia…?" He whispered in shock. "It's really you?"

"Do I really look that different? Because you haven't changed a bit… you still have that ridiculous costume, too." Natasha pointed out, pulling at one of the straps of his Captain America uniform.

Steve didn't appear to have heard that last part as he kept staring at her. "You've… matured." He answered, putting a hand under her chin and tilting it to look more closely at her eyes. "Still just as short, though." He added with a chuckle.

Natasha hit him lightly on the arm, unable to stop the smile that came to her lips. "This reunion will have to be continued later- my best friend is missing."

He paused. "Best friend? Who?"

"Clint Barton. Let's get to the mission briefing," Natasha answered, turning away from him and continuing the route she had been originally taking him.

"Alright," He relented, but he was never more than two steps behind her for the rest of the walk. "But we _will_ be continuing this later."

"And reconnecting," Natasha added seductively, winking at him.

* * *

 **New York, 2012: A resturaunt, after defeating aliens.**

It was during Shawarma that Natasha started noticing the looks she was getting from Steve. There was no reason that she wouldn't be able to talk to him now, about… well, everything. She waited until after everybody had eaten before walking off with Steve on her trail. He followed her to one of her safe houses, where she waited outside. "You could have walked with me, you know."

"Too suspicious," He replied. "I believe we were going to talk about, well, _us."_

"Inside." She opened the door for him, stepping to one side. "And you practically stalking me _wasn't_ suspicious?" She countered.

He huffed. "It wasn't _stalking_ , just… following closely." He defended, stepping inside.

Natasha hummed before following him inside and locking the door. She turned around, ready to have probably one of the most boring-est conversations of her life- she knew he'd ask for them to keep things quiet about the past, and all that crap. However, she had barely faced him when his lips were on hers, his hand sliding around her waist onto the small of her back to pull her closer. There was no hesitation in her movements as she responded to the kiss, her arms wrapping around his neck and pulling herself closer to him.

They parted for breath, and she couldn't help but say, "I love this kind of talking."

That ignited a laugh from his lips, which was muffled by her own. She felt herself lifted off the floor and being carried, having to pull her lips from his again to tell him where to go, but that didn't halt their desires.

* * *

Natasha rolled onto her back as she got her breath back quickly. "If I'd known that was what you meant by talking, I'd have pulled you aside earlier."

Steve chuckled, rolling onto his side to face her before grabbing the covers and pulling it over both of them- even though they didn't really care. "We _do_ need to talk, I just thought we'd get reconnecting out of the way."

"Out of the way?" Natasha raised an eyebrow at him.

"Not what I meant." Steve replied apologetically, shaking his head.

She offered him a half-smile. "I thought you'd have learnt to talk to women when you dated Margaret Carter." She knew that revealed that she had previously checked up on him, but didn't care.

His face dropped instantly, staring at her slightly in shock for a few tense moments. "Peggy." He stated, obviously not quite sure what to say. "I wouldn't say we _dated_."

"Really? That's not what I've heard." Natasha replied coolly as she sat up, pulling the sheets with her. It seemed wrong to leave anything of herself exposed when she was talking about his ex. "Does she know you're alive?"

Steve's expression answered her question.

"Of course she doesn't. You were frozen in time for 38 months- that doesn't mean you shouldn't live." Natasha told him. The puzzled expression on his face matched the one she would have shown if she hadn't been keeping it closed off- it sounded an awful lot like she was trying to get him to call his old girlfriend. Then she realised that was _exactly_ what she was doing. "She deserves to know you're alive before she sees the news with you gallivanting around, fighting aliens."

That got his attention. "You're right… I'll call her later."

"Call her now- and call Howard at the same time."

"Wouldn't Tony have told him?"

Natasha shook her head. "They might be brothers, but they never talk- it's like they're in completely different worlds."

Steve sighed, looking like he wanted to say something, but rolled over and grabbed his phone instead. He looked at her for a long moment. "I'll call Howard first." He told her before dialing the number- that showed that he _had_ looked up his old acquaintances, but felt no need to actually contact them. And yet he bumps into her and they end up in bed during their first- official- moment. She couldn't help but lean slightly closer to listen in to the conversation.

"Hello?"

"Howard, it's Steve- Steve Rogers." He replied, putting the phone on speaker, placing it on the bed- he'd obviously noticed her listening it.

"Steve?" Howard replied, bewilderment in his voice. "You're alive? How? When?"

Steve looked at Natasha- what, did he think she could help answer that question for him? "A couple of months. Sorry it's taken me so long to-"

"Peggy! It's Steve!" Howard called.

Steve's eyes widened and his hand twitched, obviously wanting to reach for the phone but restraining himself.

"Yeah, it's really him." Howard confirmed.

"Steve?"

Steve glanced at Natasha again; this time it was a different look and Natasha wasn't sure what to make of it. The person on the other end was a big part of Steve's life before the ice- she knew that. "Hey, Peg."

"You're alive!" Peggy exclaimed.

"Couldn't leave my… I owe you a dance." Steve replied, hesitating halfway through.

"Your girl?" Natasha whispered, questioning what he'd been about to say. Steve shook his head quickly.

"Steve… how long have you been back?" Peggy asked, sounding stunned.

Steve took a breath. "A few weeks. How have you been?"

She took a few moments to reply. "I've been good," she answered. "Steve…" This time there was no continuation and she just stayed quiet.

"What is it, Peg?" He asked. Natasha frowned at the nickname, 'Peg'. She couldn't help the not-so-nice thoughts that flew through her head, but remained silent.

"Oh, Steve… What happened?" Peggy finally asked, an unknown emotion in her tone. "You were dead… but now you're on the phone… What happened?"

Natasha knew by the expression on his face that he was trying to think of the official reason he had survived; the serum, being frozen. As he opened his mouth, she decided to make her presence known to the woman on the other end. "His body was preserved when he went into the ice. The serum kept him alive, so when he was found, he was able to be resuscitated."

"It's a miracle." Steve added.

"Steve, who is that?" Peggy suddenly demanded. In the background, Howard could be heard muttering, "How the hell is that possible?"

Steve's eyes visibly widened, but that was his only reaction before he answered. "Uhh... Natasha."

Natasha raised an eyebrow- that was very well said, but she definitely wasn't helping him on this question.

Peggy made a sound halfway between a snort and a groan. "Steve, when someone asks 'who is that', telling them the name of a person they've never met doesn't usually clarify anything. Care to elaborate?"

"She's a fr…" Steve paused. Natasha's eyes dared him to continue. "An old acq…" He stopped again.

Friend? Old acquaintance? If he couldn't introduce her or decide who she was, she'd help him out. "I'm the person he just had sex with. Continue your conversation." Natasha provided with a smirk.

There was a tense silence on the line for almost thirty seconds before Peggy forced out, " _Really?"_ She cut off and suddenly Howard had taken the phone.

"Nice to properly meet you, Natasha," he said pointedly, Peggy muttering something unintelligible, "Tony's talked about you quite a bit."

"It's all lies, I'm sure." Natasha replied smoothly. "Tony mentioned that you were in Spain? Or are you in California now?"

There was a small chuckle. "California. Where are you two lovebirds?" Some more grumbling from Peggy. "Or is it top secret?" The smile was audible in his voice.

"New York; turn on the news, you idiot. Tony, me, Steve, Thor, Clint- we're all probably on it." Natasha replied.

Howard laughed again. "So you two just had sex in the presence of the other Avengers, then?" He asked mischievously. "Funny, I don't remember Tony mentioning that."

Steve ran a hand down his face. "I suppose Tony didn't mention aliens coming through the sky and trying to kill all of human race, either?"

"Oh, that. Yeah, that was the main topic of our conversation."

"Give me the _phone,_ Howard!" Peggy suddenly piped up, and a small scuffle was heard before her voice came through, much clearer. "What's your last name, Natasha?" The name was spoken with just the _tiniest_ bit of acid in her tone.

Natasha smirked, looking at Steve with absolute delight. "My apologies, Margaret Carter, but I am going to have to terminate this call. You see, Steve and I were sharing very crucial information about our future together, but I thought it would be prudent for him to contact you both to notify you of his living status before you saw it on the news."

"What?" Peggy exclaimed indignantly. "Steve? Steve!"

"I'll call you later, Peg." Steve promised. "And you too, Howard."

Natasha ended the call, looking at Steve pointedly. "She appears jealous- were you two a thing?" She questioned, even though she had previously stated that she knew of his past relationship.

"In a way, yes." Steve replied truthfully. "I don't believe we should have a conversation in our current… situation."

"You mean naked? It doesn't make any difference to me." Natasha replied, but at his hesitation she slipped out of bed, gathered his clothes- that were in the room- and threw them to him before opening a drawer and putting on some new clean clothes. "Now talk."

Steve turned on the bed to face her as she stood there, waiting stoically. "It was a few years after we were together, and only really lasted a few months before I was frozen- although you and I had a more intense relationship." He paused. "It was a very different dynamic."

Natasha nodded; she had never thought about the prospect of running into him again, and never even considered that he would continue to live a normal life. It would have been strange if he didn't date anybody else, of course, but she never thought she would have the opportunity to ever even see him again. Her dreams were long forgotten; the dreams she had whilst with Steve had vanished- she didn't want them to return if he wasn't on the same page. "What did you want to do?"

"Now?"

She shook her head. "It's okay if you want to go to Peggy; she'll be good for you. You'll be good together."

As she took a step back, he jumped up to his feet. "That's not what I want! _She's_ not what I want." Natasha retreated another step from him, and he seemed to freeze in place. "Nat…" he started, but didn't continue.

Natasha knew she was acting irrationally. Less than an hour ago they were twisted together within the sheets, and now she wouldn't let him step closer to her. She had honestly brought him here to talk, to discuss what had happened between them and their course of action- which, to her, was him asking her to not mention what happened to anybody. However, that is definitely not what happened and she wasn't prepared; she hated being unprepared. "Steve, I'm not what you want." She informed him.

Steve stepped forward, but only a step; it was some sign that he disagreed with the distance. "Nat, I know what I want." He replied softly. "If you don't want it, that's fine."

Natasha found herself speechless, which did not happen that often. "I didn't say that." She found herself saying, although she wasn't sure exactly what she was agreeing to. But she'd rather agree to whatever he was silently offering than see him with somebody else- mainly because she wasn't completely against murdering somebody.

He approached her, cautiously at first; however, by the time his lips met hers, there was no caution or hesitation on either side.

* * *

 _ **The End! Thanks for reading this one-shot, I'd love a review.**_

 _ **No, there will not be a sequel.**_


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